Those Floors

Those bare, cold floors, they are the canvas on which my tears fall
The pool that holds a vast array of that which spills out of the inner chambers
Those bare, cold floors contain all that my soul daily tries to suppress, to hide away
There they stay, those stains, those scabs, those open wounds that I willingly re-puncture
so they bleed, so once again, I can breathe
I wondered how long it would take, for me to wake, for me to feel, for me to come alive again
In the cage of my damaged emotions, I had been suffocating that I became so accustomed ...
Accustomed to the unworthiness, the negativity, the self-degradation, the horrible forms of self-injury
And it is on those bare, cold floors that the pain lays there so nakedly
It is in the river of my tears that clarity surfaces and arrives on scene
There in the darkness, my body began to violently react to the dirt, the grime, the filth that had been so embedded
There in the pit, my inner being shook and while the tears fell, the clutter within was being purged
Never before had I so urgently wanted something to leave me, to make its way out of me and never come back again
Those bare, cold floors helped to usher a timely exit that is still taking place
If freedom is a journey, it is those bare, cold floors that serves as my "magic carpet ride"
As God sits, stays, comes close and says, "I can show you a whole new world, if you'd just come with Me."
Many times before, it is He that has met me on those floors
This time, once again it is He who meets me on those floors
There on those bare, cold floors, in my extreme emotional poverty, He lifted me up
In my constant state of weakness, He still brings me before His throne
Still, I need to be reminded that I am not my own, that He deemed me worthy, worthy enough to be bought with a price
And it is on those floors where He finds me, sees me, and takes the time to patiently breathe new life into me
On those bare, cold floors, it is there He stays with me and says, "I see. I see you ... I see."
On those floors, in the river of my tears, He is found by me and I am KNOWN by Him.
It is while I am on those bare, cold floors where I remember that He, He knows me, all of me.